Joe Davis – Announcer [00:00:00]:

The following content is not suitable for children.

Laurie Watson [00:00:02]:

So George is going to put on his sex therapist hat today and help us with simultaneous orgasms. You ready? Gee. Woohoo.

George Faller [00:00:11]:

Bring it on, Laurie. Let’s do this.

Laurie Watson [00:00:15]:

Welcome to foreplay sex therapy. I’m Dr. Laurie Watson, your sex therapist.

George Faller [00:00:20]:

And I’m George Faller, a couple’s therapist.

Laurie Watson [00:00:23]:

We are here to talk about sex.

George Faller [00:00:25]:

Our mission is to help couples talk about sex in ways that incorporate their body, their mind, and their hearts.

Laurie Watson [00:00:33]:

And we have a little bit of fun doing it. Right.

George Faller [00:00:34]:

G. Listen and let’s change some relationships. So excited. Laurie. Another in person training. Philadelphia unleashing the power of sex and EFT for therapists. October 4 and October 5. This is one of our favorite trainings to do. It’s such a need out there to empower therapists, to keep their focus better in session and know how to help couples facilitate these bonding conversations through sex. Most of us don’t grow up in families talking about this stuff. So get some of the tools that you need. Have some fun. Engage with other therapists. It’s great to be back in person.

Laurie Watson [00:01:12]:

Oh, yes, it is so great to be in person. We had so much fun in our last in person training. I mean, people actually laugh at our jokes. And I got to say, some of what we’re doing, I think it’s pretty cutting edge. We’re working on stage one and stage two. For those of you who are therapists and EFT, you’ll get what we’re talking about. But even if you’re not an EFT therapist, there’s a lot here that you can learn about how to talk with couples about sex and how to become more expert at it.

George Faller [00:01:40]:

And if you’re a listener and you do have a therapist and your therapist doesn’t know about EFT, tell them, you know what? I think you should check this training out. I guarantee they’ll come out of that training with some new tools, which is that’s what we’re in the business of, right? Creating change with new tools.

Laurie Watson [00:01:55]:

Yes. So come join us in October in Philadelphia.

George Faller [00:02:00]:

My sex therapist had uh oh. Feels a little small for my head.

Laurie Watson [00:02:05]:

Let’s not talk about small right now.

George Faller [00:02:08]:

All right. Nothing wrong with.

Laurie Watson [00:02:13]:

You know, most of the time when I see couples, they are coming in and they’re anxious about something, and one of the things that they bring me is this desire to have simultaneous orgasms. And because women don’t usually climax during sexual intercourse and men usually do, I kind of tend to push people away from that and say, I think the point is mutual pleasure. The point is maybe both people having orgasms, but let’s talk about maybe what it would be like to have a simultaneous orgasm. And what’s so great about that?

George Faller [00:02:52]:

It’s the pinnacle of the sexual experience, right? Not only are you reaching your orgasm, but at precisely the same moment, your partner is so turned on and pleasured with you that they can’t contain themselves. So it’s like a double whammy. An orgasm is pretty great, but be doing it with your partner at the same time. I think it strengthens that bond. I mean, that’s just a moment of true merger. I think when two people have orgasm and when you experience it, it feels so good, no wonder why so many couples want to replicate that. And I don’t think there’s anything wrong with wanting more of those moments. I just think so many couples put pressure on it and then it makes it more elusive. But I like that you’re leaning into like, what’s so cool about it? Why are people chasing this?

Laurie Watson [00:03:42]:

Yeah, so I really hear that, that it’s a sense of merger because you’re both with each other and kind of lost in this ecstatic moment together. That sounds very hot. I get it.

George Faller [00:03:58]:

Lost together. It’s a good imagery. I think sometimes when you’re lost in your own orgasm and your partner is enjoying that, you’re having an orgasm, but they’re not lost. They’re trying to get there. They’re enjoying the process, but there’s something magical about it happening at the same time.

Laurie Watson [00:04:18]:

Nice. So we want to maybe later help people. Like how do they do that if they want to try for that? And maybe then talk about the feelings if they can’t get there.

George Faller [00:04:35]:

Yeah. So where are we going to start?

Laurie Watson [00:04:38]:

So how could we help people technically reach mutual orgasm?

George Faller [00:04:44]:

Well, that’s why we do this podcast. You got to be able to communicate. It’s not going to magically happen. Right. You got to be able to talk about what’s turning you on. And I think couples, especially couples in long term relationships, they start to be able to read each other’s cues. And if, say, the husband comes quickly, you’re going to have to slow it down if you’re going to kind of want your partner to kind of come with you. Right. So how do you get the timing down? I think that’s probably the most important thing. Right?

Laurie Watson [00:05:19]:

That’s the trick for sure.

George Faller [00:05:21]:

And I think a lot of times say that the husband wants to orgasm during intercourse. Having the wife use a vibrator during intercourse can make it more likely that the timing is going to kind of line up with each other.

Laurie Watson [00:05:39]:

Right. So she’s using a vibrator, getting aroused, and he’s sensing that, feeling that watching that, and then he kind of has to hold off until she’s right there.

George Faller [00:05:53]:

I think that’s probably the most common one. I will hear from couples how they.

Laurie Watson [00:05:57]:

Can do it and there could be a lot of positions that they could make that work. Right. Maybe her on top using a vibrator on her clitoris or from behind.

George Faller [00:06:10]:

And given that 80% of women don’t orgasm with just intercourse without clitoral stimulation, no wonder why it’s so hard for so many couples to have a mutual orgasm. They’re expecting it to happen during intercourse, and it’s just not likely to happen at the same time. Right, but if you add the vibrator or some kind of stimulation to the clitoris simultaneous of you have a much better chance of reaching that. At the same time.

Laurie Watson [00:06:38]:

I suppose a man could technically touch her clitoris during intercourse, like maybe on top and using his thumb or something like that, but it might be a little bit slower. But maybe the timing needs to be when she’s already pretty aroused. And then they start intercourse.

George Faller [00:06:59]:

I had another couple talk about masturbating with each other and waiting for the timing to be able to orgasm together to see what that’s like. And that’s usually easy to do, right? If you can kind of wait for your partner, wait for your kind of control yourself to, all right, let’s do it.

Laurie Watson [00:07:21]:

So they’re masturbating together, and then they’re sort of right on the edge, and then they come together in intercourse. Right.

George Faller [00:07:27]:

And one person starts getting coming too quickly. A lot of times the guy has to stop and let the woman catch up. We talked about women that’s one of the gifts can have multiple orgasms, right? So if they go quick and a guy’s not ready, I’ll do it again. But I just think the masturbation causes a degree of communication, of reading each other, of communicating. Slow down, I’m not there yet. And that, again, I think, translates back into the bedroom.

Laurie Watson [00:08:02]:

So they got to keep talking about where they’re at. Yeah, that sounds good. Sounds exciting. And what happens if one just kind of falls off the cliff before the other one’s there? What do you think?

George Faller [00:08:17]:

They get put in time out. We know this is a competition. This is a game. You failed your team.

Laurie Watson [00:08:24]:

They get spanked.

George Faller [00:08:25]:

They get spanked.

Laurie Watson [00:08:26]:

Yeah. Okay.

George Faller [00:08:30]:

I do think that is the key of what we’re talking about. Right. If you make it the goal and you get disappointed if you don’t reach it, that sets a couple up for failure. If it’s something that can happen, awesome. Enjoy it. But there are a lot of things that get in the way of making that happen. And sex can be amazing without simultaneous orgasms. So again, I think it’s the expectations. Couples that have the expectation this is what’s supposed to happen are constantly disappointed, and then they get frustrated, and then there’s pressure and there’s resentment, and then that stuff really messes with your sex life.

Laurie Watson [00:09:04]:

It does. And that’s who I see come into my office is the couples who have tried, and maybe it’s more important to one person. And then they’re messed up. They’re not even enjoying the fact that they’re having orgasms. It’s like it’s a fail rather than, okay, we got to try again, practice makes perfect kind of thing.

George Faller [00:09:27]:

Well, let’s stick with that. Why do some people really push for that? And again, I think when they’ve experienced not only the amazing feeling of their own orgasm. But knowing their partner is orgasm at the same time, like you’re being successful, you’ve turned your partner on, it’s a total relaxation. There’s no worry about even when you’re having an orgasm, your partner is not. You still got that in the back of your mind. Or what about my partner? Is my partner going to have an orgasm? There’s still a part of you holding out and worrying and has some pressure on that, right. When you have your partner, I wonder.

Laurie Watson [00:10:08]:

If that is like male pressure because I don’t experience that pressure.

George Faller [00:10:13]:

Goodness. Why we’re having us talk about it?

Laurie Watson [00:10:15]:

Maybe it’s men who if their partner has maybe because as a woman, right, you’re pretty sure that he’s going to so it’s not like this fear of if I climax first, then he’s going to be so disappointed. But I can imagine as a woman or as a man, maybe it’s like, well, if I come first I can’t get her there or is she going.

George Faller [00:10:41]:

To get there or afterwards what am I going to have?

Laurie Watson [00:10:43]:

Or is she going to give up?

George Faller [00:10:46]:

Yeah.

Laurie Watson [00:10:47]:

Or I’m going to go to sleep and have to keep working.

George Faller [00:10:51]:

Well, if the woman orgasms first, I think for a lot of men it’s like, all right, the pressure is off and they can enjoy their orgasm a little bit more and she might come again, right?

Laurie Watson [00:11:04]:

Yeah.

George Faller [00:11:05]:

But interesting you’re saying a lot of women don’t feel that way, that if their partner orgasms or they have an orgasm first, they don’t worry about their partner’s orgasm.

Laurie Watson [00:11:17]:

I have not heard that as a worry. I mean, I think there are special circumstances when a man may be having trouble with orgasm, but only under very special circumstances. But no, I think that whole book, she comes first, ian Kerner wrote about making sure she comes at know and then sometimes your body is kind of so high that you might come a second time with sexual intercourse or whatever. But I don’t think there’s any fear in most women. Like if I climax, then I have to worry about is he going to climax?

George Faller [00:11:54]:

Well, what if the guy has ed issues, right, and you orgasm and he doesn’t orgasm? And then you’re like, does he not find me attractive? He might not orgasm, it might not happen again. That part of you that’s holding back, that’s still thinking about it, I think steals a little energy from the orgasm.

Laurie Watson [00:12:17]:

Sure. If you’re still thinking about it. Right. In that circumstance, if you’re worried about.

George Faller [00:12:21]:

Him and that is a male thing. I think a lot of men do have that. If they orgasm first and their partner doesn’t orgasm, then it is, have I performed good enough? Because a lot of times the partner doesn’t orgasm and a lot of women that’s good enough, they don’t have to have an orgasm, right. So it’s like I’m glad we connected. I’m glad that we were intimate. I’m glad we had this time. But I think for a guy to orgasm and his partner doesn’t orgasm, there’s a part of him that feels a little disappointed in that.

Laurie Watson [00:12:58]:

Certainly disappointed maybe for her. But you’re also saying disappointed that he didn’t do it, right? I mean, I think men often have that sense of I got to last a long time, right, to get her there.

George Faller [00:13:16]:

Well, we’ve talked about the loneliness that a lot of couples can experience in these moments during an orgasm. It’s like, I don’t want to orgasm. I want my part of the orgasm with me. And then all of a sudden, here comes the orgasm. I don’t really want it now, and I can’t really stop myself, but I feel disappointed. I’m orgasm too fast. I’m disappointed my partner is not having an orgasm. A lot of times in those moments is where the sex stops, and that trains the body to kind of get a bit lonely during this orgasm. So when you have that mutual orgasm, it’s like, I don’t have any of those shadows come in.

Laurie Watson [00:13:58]:

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George Faller [00:15:10]:

Exactly. I mean, when couples prepare themselves for different timing, they can just flow with it, right? They could move with it. It’s not a big deal. But if you got this expectation of a mutual orgasm and you have an orgasm by yourself, that actually could wind up and that’s what’s so sad. You actually have an orgasm, but it’s not so fulfilling because you kind of got all this stuff that bleeds into it. Well, let’s come back and talk about what we can do with that. How do we help people find more common ground with their orgasms?

Laurie Watson [00:15:43]:

More common ground? Mutual ground.

George Faller [00:15:46]:

Mutual ground.

Laurie Watson [00:15:47]:

Simultaneous ground.

George Faller [00:15:51]:

Cozy earth sheets. Does it get any sexier than that? Laurie?

Laurie Watson [00:15:56]:

It really doesn’t. I swear.

George Faller [00:15:57]:

It is a nice this is a good foreplay right there. Just feeling your skin against those sheets.

Laurie Watson [00:16:03]:

I mean, these sheets make your clothes fall off. I’m telling you. Absolutely. Cozy Earth, their bamboo sheets are freaking amazing. And I now will never sleep with anything else when I travel. George I like, bring Cozy Earth pillowcases with me because I don’t want my head on anything else. I mean, it is so soft and it’s elegant. It’s like luxury. I mean, luxury bedding. And it’s backed by a lengthy warranty, which is awesome. And they have sheets and blankets and more. They also have cool, very cool pajamas. Y’all, I don’t know if I’m allowed to say that this time, but it is great. And it’s temperature regulating, so men often run a little bit hot in bed. Let’s say hot in bed, right? And women like that soft, warm, and it does both. It is so great. So please check out cozy Earth. Cozy Earth provides an exclusive offer for our foreplay listeners. 35% off site wide. When you use the code Foreplay. That’s cozyearth.com. Check it out. So good.

George Faller [00:17:09]:

And take Lori’s guarantee the sheets will take your clothes off.

Laurie Watson [00:17:15]:

Uber Lube. It’s a luxury lubricant. Can you say that three times fast? Uber Lube. Luxury lubricant. Basically, it’s pure silicone bliss. It is made from superior ingredients. It has skin soothing vitamin E, and it goes on just like natural moisture, and it lasts a long time. There’s no drip. Their glass bottles are truly beautiful. You can leave them on your bedstand. I do, no problem. Nobody notices. And it’s basically like this thin, slippery silicone formulation. It reduces friction, which is great, but it doesn’t reduce sensation. And it stays slippery long enough for lasting pleasure. They have travel friendly, toughened glass bottles. You can slip it in your gym bag. You can slip it in your purse. You can be ready whenever. Try. Uber lube. The silicone [email protected]. Use the code Foreplay for 10% off. Really? It is the best lubricant on the market. We are doing a couple’s retreat on September eigth, so please keep that in mind in your schedule. For your fall schedule. We want to give you a heads up. We’re only doing one this year because our training schedule is getting crazy. But we would love to invite you to our couples retreat on September eigth. It’s by Zoom, and you can find it on our website. Fourplacextherapy.com.

George Faller [00:18:38]:

Nice. And we just completed training therapists. Two days. Right on. Sex. Had over 100 therapists. How much fun was that, Laurie, to just kind of, again, get all these questions. We don’t have all the answers, but we’re just again, that excitement is just trying to help us all get clear and clear and start leaning in this direction because it’s such a great need to help couples talk about their sex.

Laurie Watson [00:18:59]:

Was it was really fun, and we’re excited to do it again for our couples. We always have fun with people who are wanting to work on their sex life and come to us, they’re always anxious, what is it going to look like? And I’m glad to email you a little bit about that talk with you so you can get comfy.

George Faller [00:19:17]:

Nice. And who don’t want to be comfy? So, Laurie, again, I remember your video that you showed one of your know, and they used to have great sex. They used to have these mutual orgasms, so they both know what it’s like.

Laurie Watson [00:19:36]:

Yeah.

George Faller [00:19:36]:

And then kids and stress, and a couple years later, he’s orgasming too quickly and he don’t want to, but he can’t help himself. There’s a lot of sensitivity there. And she is disappointed. She don’t get to have an orgasm. They don’t have a lot of flexibility. Like after he orgasms, he helps her orgasm because he gets a bit frustrated and disappointed, and she gets disappointed in.

Laurie Watson [00:20:02]:

Himself, not in her. Right.

George Faller [00:20:04]:

But she gets disappointed in him.

Laurie Watson [00:20:07]:

Yeah.

George Faller [00:20:08]:

So again, he picks up that signal, and now you can see how these moments, because they have different expectations, start to really lead to disconnection, not connection. And I think that’s so sad, this most intimate of moments, and it leads to further disconnection, not connection.

Laurie Watson [00:20:28]:

Yeah. I think that woman could climax with sexual intercourse, and that’s probably that occasion or that situation combination of a woman who can climax with sexual intercourse and a man who wants her to. I can imagine how both of them might feel like, OOH, this wasn’t a ten or something.

George Faller [00:20:51]:

Yeah. I love that. You’re going to Scores, Laurie? I’m using numbers, speaking my numbers, my numbers game. Here we go.

Laurie Watson [00:21:01]:

Yeah.

George Faller [00:21:01]:

But it is helpful to assess the quality of the engagement because it helps people give each other feedback. So he has all this pressure on him. It’s getting in the way of his engaging. So if he could talk about and he feels himself coming close, he should stop having sex. He should pull out and chill out. Or you talk a lot about the squeeze technique, or stop and start and stop. I failed my sex therapy course.

Laurie Watson [00:21:31]:

Damn it. Damn it.

George Faller [00:21:33]:

I did say the stop and start technique.

Laurie Watson [00:21:35]:

You did afterwards. Right. Okay. I’m giving you a half point.

George Faller [00:21:38]:

Half a point. Well, again, there are things to do, but what’s more important is that recognition that says, all right, if I don’t want to come too quickly, if that’s going to create a lot of shame or distress or disappointment, then I got to figure out how to kind of change my timing a bit more. Maybe I need to give my partner oral sex. Or, I mean, what do I need to do that allows me to feel like we’re on the same page?

Laurie Watson [00:22:04]:

Right. Because for women, there’s also kind of a near point of inevitability, too. I don’t know. I’ll give you some more numbers. Gee, but probably we’re switching roles on this one. I like it when she’s at about 90, 95, which she could stay there for a long time, but she’s going to have an orgasm. It could possibly be interrupted, but she’s going to have an orgasm. She’s not having one yet, but she’s definitely going to. I think as a woman, there’s this point that it all feels good, but then there’s this point that it feels great. And once you kind of reach that great realm, you’re going to have an orgasm. So maybe getting her really stimulated to that point, and then she kind of talks about it, right? Like, okay, I am ready to go. Let’s have intercourse. That’s more of a sure thing. Then I would imagine that intercourse kind of pushes her over the edge with clitoral stimulation maybe continuing or maybe not.

George Faller [00:23:19]:

I hope the bells are going off here. Laurie, you’re giving you a little cheat sheet to the men out there. Why you emphasize the foreplay? 20 minutes of foreplay is priming that woman to kind of be ready when you’re ready. Most men just move too quickly. The testosterone says, I’m ready, I’m hard. Let’s do this. I’m turned on. Let’s go. Let’s have intercourse. And they start having intercourse for a couple of minutes. They’re ready to go, and their partner is not there yet. So again, if you want to have simultaneous orgasms or close to it, you got to kind of give the other person the time and they need to achieve that.

Laurie Watson [00:23:53]:

Yeah, exactly. And let’s say then she comes and he’s not quite there, he’ll have to catch up. I think what I would worry about with couples is just like you said, this is all so good. It’s all so good. And I would hate for people to feel like they’re failing, not getting there, and that’s who I see. But if you’re naked, you’re having intercourse, you’re touching, you’re having oral sex, and you’re close and you both have orgasms or I don’t know. Hard to beat that, I think. But then I guess you’re saying simultaneous orgasm beats even that.

George Faller [00:24:38]:

I don’t think we have to compare it because, again, when we think it’s the best and we start thinking that is the goal, it puts a ton of pressure. I think it’s an end both scenario. Separate orgasms are pretty amazing. A mutual orgasm is pretty amazing. Whatever happens, right. It’s that space that you’re opening up that’s key. It’s to connect and explore and to play. That’s the goal. Not the mutual orgasm. That puts too much pressure on. But it’s okay to have a mutual orgasm if that’s something that you both want to try for. And you could get your timing down because that’s the hardest thing, just getting your timing down, then why not go for it, see what it’s like?

Laurie Watson [00:25:16]:

So overall, they got to have intercourse and clitoral stimulation. So they got to be in that.

George Faller [00:25:21]:

Kind of a position, clitoral stimulation. I just read that the clitoris is the only organ that’s solely in either partner that is solely designed for sexual pleasure.

Laurie Watson [00:25:33]:

Yay.

George Faller [00:25:35]:

You often talk about a woman’s broken starter, but they got this damn little like superpower thing that’s pretty amazing.

Laurie Watson [00:25:43]:

They got this damn little superpower thing.

George Faller [00:25:46]:

This little design, just for sexual pleasure. Our sexual pleasure pots do multiple things, right? They multitask.

Laurie Watson [00:25:55]:

Yeah.

George Faller [00:25:55]:

Maybe that’s why we don’t multitask men in general, because we’re too busy multitasking in sex. In sex.

Laurie Watson [00:26:03]:

I know.

George Faller [00:26:03]:

Our penis is doing too many different things.

Laurie Watson [00:26:05]:

Yeah, our clitoris is just have fun. That’s all it’s about.

George Faller [00:26:09]:

How cool is that?

Laurie Watson [00:26:11]:

It is so cool. And I think about so many women who kind of deny that as a woman, that they should have sexual pleasure for some reason or another and gosh, their body is telling them otherwise.

George Faller [00:26:27]:

That’s a pretty cool body.

Laurie Watson [00:26:30]:

Yeah, pretty cool body. Exactly. Okay, so simultaneous orgasms a great thing. I’ve been putting it sort of aside because I don’t want people to feel too pressured. But we’re saying it could be cool to be lost together in pleasure and sort of you’re in outer space together. Right.

George Faller [00:26:52]:

Just it’s magical when you have those moments of knowing. I mean, it’s total presence to where, you know, you’re in this realm of letting go, of merger. There’s no distractions. You can just feel the other person letting go at the same time. Right. And I think everyone should experience it once in a lifetime at least. And there’s no reason you can’t figure it out once. I mean, just the luck of the draw. If you have sex enough with the same person, at some point they should line up. If you’re very kind of intentional and you can communicate and you’re aware of each other, right? I mean, you’re developing this flow of synchrony. And when you get each other’s timing down, I think does get easier to kind of get there. So if you’re a couple not having and you’re having great sex, the proof is in the levels of engagement. If you’re having great sex, having it separate, cool. Keep doing what you’re doing. But if you want to give this a shot without putting too much pressure on yourself, enjoy the party, baby.

Laurie Watson [00:27:58]:

Thanks for listening.

George Faller [00:28:00]:

Keep it hot, y’all.

Laurie Watson [00:28:01]:

I would love to invite you. This is women only, but we are having a retreat in Asheville on November 10 through the twelveTH and it’s going to be a slumber party. And so we’re going to all stay together in the same cabin. It’s a beautiful space and we’re going to have meals brought in and made and we know who the chef is and so it’s going to be wonderful. Maybe drink a little bit of wine if you’d like to. And we have kind of some talks and time to work together on your sexuality. So the whole goal of this women’s sexuality retreat, the slumber party, is to basically enhance and develop yourself, your erotic self inside. So we’re going to be talking about anatomy and physiology and sexual attachment. We’re going to talk through blocks. What stops us? What are the breaks against our sexual expression? And then what are our gas pedals? What are our turn ons? How do we open up more sexually, like with enhanced sexual pleasure? And we’re going to talk about orgasms and roleplay and using joys and fantasies and some stuff. And each night we’re going to have a pajama party where we just relax and sit around and talk on the deck and hang out together. And then on Sunday morning, we’re going to set our focus and have concrete steps toward sexual engagement with our partners.

George Faller [00:29:24]:

Sounds pretty awesome. Laurie and all the men. Don’t worry about it. Maybe we’ll have, like, a Spartan camp out somewhere, have a couple of beers, and we’ll do our own version of that someday.

Laurie Watson [00:29:36]:

That would be great. So, love to invite you. I will post it on Foreplaysextherapy.com under Resources, and there will be the retreat, the scheduling events, and you can link and figure out if you can make it with us on November 10 through the twelveTH in 2023. Asheville be there.

Joe Davis – Announcer [00:29:57]:

Call in your questions to the Foreplay Question voicemail dial eight three three my. Foreplay. That’s eight, three three my. The number four play, and we’ll use the questions for our mailbag episodes. All content is for entertainment purposes only and should not be considered as a substitute for therapy by a licensed clinician or as medical advice from a doctor. This podcast is copyrighted by Foreplay Media.

Speaker Ads [00:30:20]:

Hi, I’m Sarah May, and I’m the host of your new favorite show, help Me, Be Me Me. It’s a self help podcast for people who hate self help. Help Me, Be Me is full of practical tools to help you overcome a variety of emotional challenges delivered in a way that’s caring but frank. So if that sounds up your alley, I would invite you to check out Help Me, Be Me on the Iheart app on Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. Thanks.